The first time is always the hardest

I just voted for the first time. No, this is almost a lie as I have voted back home in Sweden before, so I’m not really a first time voter, rather a second time first time voter. But it is the first time I vote in a UK election, and as I have dual citizenship I am allowed to vote in both general and local elections. But my experience as a voter has not exactly made it easier for me to vote. Because despite having an interest in politics, being (relatively) up to date with the election campaign, watched all the debates and not the least have a BA in Politics and philosophy, I found it really hard to make up my mind. And for a brief moment I even considered not voting because I would not know what or who I actually voted for.
According to voting behaviour theorists I should not have a difficulty to make up my mind, I am interested in politics, I am educated and I even have a somewhat ideological identification (this identification is highly theoretical though as I don’t go on what the parties say and do but rather where their ideology puts them on the left-right scale rather than that I feel like working/middle-class, I suppose that is what a degree in politics and philosophy does to you). But I am young, and we all know that young people don’t vote, whether we think it is because they don’t care or because they cant make up their mind about things that don’t concern them, polls continuously show that young people don’t vote. So this is what makes it so difficult, I am young! Ah the relief to know that this is something I will grow out of, the first time is always the hardest and it gets easier with time.
But hang on. I have voted before. I have already started to establish a habit of voting, because I have voted in every election that I am eligible for, even the European Parliament (but only for Sweden that time as I don’t want to cause any injustice in having my vote count twice). And if Franklin is right this should be a sign of that I am a secure voter, and combined with the rest of my characteristics I should not have any difficulties voting. But does the habit mean that I am ‘better’ at voting or making up my mind, or does it just mean that I don’t care about the difficulties anymore?
But I did have difficulties despite having the habit of voting. Despite recognising the importance of voting and politics (my PhD is on exactly this topic), I considered spoiling my ballot paper or not voting at all. Because I didn’t know what or who to vote for. I didn’t know what the candidates stood for, until a week ago I didn’t know what constituency I lived in or who my candidates were. I would not have been able to make a rational and informed decision of who I wanted to run the country or the local council.
The irony is that I live in a constituency where it is a close race between conservatives and Liberal Democrats. So I ought to have been bombarded with information and parties wishing to get my vote. But nothing. Until three days before the election, then I received a letter from the conservative candidate, (with awful pictures one where she was walking her dog sporting a massive camel toe!) and this letter was addressed to Mrs. Rainsford. I don’t know who Mr. Rainsford is and as far as I know there is none. Maybe it was some indirect and obscure way of promoting their marriage-tax benefit.
Instead I have followed the media’s reporting on the election campaign and the promises made by the parties. But most public statements that they make is about telling us how bad the other party is, I know that is a long tradition in politics, but as we saw with Obama it is possible to win it differently. I have even glanced through the manifestos, but their main accomplishment it to make me angry because they are so cheesy. And to be fair, I don’t understand what they say.
To be fair there has been some events around campus and the halls, that I have unfortunately missed as I have had other engagements. And if some of my research is correct, meeting the candidates is more effective than getting bombarded with PR from the parties. It gives it a personal touch and interest. It could however also have the complete opposite effect as we saw with Cameron at Southampton University and Brown in Rochdale.
But the difficulties were not over yet. The actual act of voting was not an easy assignment either. I got to my polling station and was actually quite excited about this direct and concrete way to exercise a right and have political influence. As I approached the door I was approached by a woman with a blue badge asking me for my electoral register number. I thought it was a bit strange, but hey, I’m a first time voter, so I said yeah sure. I assumed that she was perhaps conservative due to the blue badge, but as she didn’t introduce hersefl as conservative I thought she might just wear a blue badge for the fun of it. Stupid, yes, but I doubt my own rationality in unknown situations, such as this poling station. Then I got my senses together and asked what it was for, she said it was an exit poll for the conservatives. Exit poll? But I was entering! And then she said, ‘so if you’re not voting Tory I don’t want your number’! If I was a bit more vein I might just have said that I would vote Tory just to please her. But I had regained some of my rationality, and said that she would have to be without my number then. Is this even legal? Isn’t the ballot supposed to be secret, and she just managed to get me to say that I was not voting Tory! Sure there are other parties to vote for, but the secrecy of the ballot is as much to not knowing what you vote for as what you don’t vote for!
When finally having escaped that minor diversion I got in to the station and found out that I was indeed allowed voting in both the general and local elections, despite the little mix-up about my nationality. What surprised me though was that they did not check any ID, did not ask for any evidence that I was the one I said I was or that I was actually British. As I live in a student flat where the 6 of us share a post box, any of my flat mates could have taken my polling card and voted for me just as long as they made the polling station before me. I would then not only have lost my vote, but the vote that ‘I’ cast would not reflect my interests. Despite all the outrageous information that the ID cards that are suggested to be introduced here I do think that simply having something that proves your identity that is not your passport is for your own security against identity fraud.
So I was given both the yellow and the white ballot paper, but as I stepped in to the polling booth I was unsure which one was for what election. It didn’t say on the ballot paper, and there was only a rather un-pedagogic note in the booth telling me which one was for which. As I stood there confused I realised I only had a certain numbers of parties to choose from, and due to the lack of information I didn’t really know much about them. I had had a look at my local MP candidates, and despite not liking the looks of one of the contenders websites or policies, I felt that I had to vote for that candidate because I didn’t like the ideology of the other.
But I ticked my boxes and went to actually cast my vote in to the black boxes. But even here it wasn’t clear which ballot would go in which box. I stood looking a bit confused and one of the volunteers came up to me and told me to put them in the boxes. I don’t remember voting being this hard!
Still, despite these difficulties I experienced voting it does feel good to have done it. And the difficulties I found with voting is not enough to make me not to vote, but I wonder whether it will really get easier with time. Only the future will tell.